Even a fool is thought wise if he.....

keeps silent...

Silence.

It's a rare thing these days.  Gone are the days of sitting on the front porch, sipping iced-tea and listening to... nothing.  Maybe there was radio, the Bible, some books and a sermon on Sunday.  The newspaper let you know what was going on in the world and what other people thought about it.  The dinner table let you know what was going on around you, and what the people around you thought about it.

And that's what mattered.

I'm not going to go into a nostalgic treatise of  how good the good 'ol days were.  We have opportunities now, that we didn't have then, to connect with and touch people's lives for the better.  We have new tools for spreading the Good News in word and deed.

But at what cost?

How much noise is too much noise?

John Dyer at Christianity Today writes on this issue much more intelligently than I ever could.

Here is an excerpt:

"What few of us realize is that when we press those "Publish," "Post," "Comment," and "Send" buttons, we are making the shift away from merely "believing" truth and stepping into the arena of publishing that belief. In doing so we are effectively assuming a position of leadership and teaching that prior to 2004 was not available to us.

James warned us, "Not many of you should presume to be teachers, my brothers, because you know that we who teach will be judged more strictly" (James 3:1, NIV1984). James goes on to graphically portray the incredible power that our tongues have both to praise and to curse especially in the context of teaching. He then says, "Who is wise and understanding among you? Let him show it by his good life." (James 3:13). Solomon echoes similar wisdom, "Even a fool is thought wise if he keeps silent" (Prov. 17:28).

Yet Facebook and Twitter do not encourage this kind of self-restraint. In fact, they encourage an opposing value system. Social media relentlessly asks us to publish our personal opinions on anything and everything that happens. There is no time for reflection in prayer, no place for discussion with other flesh and blood image bearers, and no incentive to remain silent.

You must declare your position, and you must declare it now.

We convince ourselves that by answering the questions social media asks us we are standing for truth alongside the great leaders of the church, but slowly and subtly as we respond to the prompts of our phones rather than our Bibles we begin to worship the false gods of immediacy, distraction, and celebrity in the Temple of Lord Zuckerberg. If you don't think the value system of technology affects you, ask yourself, If it was 2003 and some author wrote some book questioning some doctrine would I have felt compelled to publish my thoughts?

The result is that a million heresy charges isn't cool any more. You know what's cool? A billion heresy charges."

You can read the article in it's entirety here:  http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2011/marchweb-only/bloggers.html?start=1

For those of you that know me (and my heart), you know that, personally, I have been struggling with the place of social media in my life and the life of my family.  Personally, I have been guilty of using it as a soapbox, and one that I am not qualified to stand on.  This is something I have known long before reading John Dyers compelling article. 

This blog was originally intended to help us stay connected to the people we love and left on the East Coast.

It has carried our story, my gratitude list and some creative writing... all worthy of the accounting.

At times it has carried dross and chaff as well.

Going forward, As Far as the East is From the West will continue to be a vehicle of sharing my gratitude to the One Most High and maybe some stories from the story He has written for us, the Liechty Family.

I will save my other musings, questions and deeper ponderings for those that can challenge and sharpen me face-to-face... heart-to-heart.

The Truth is too important for me to try to sell it in the bits and pieces that I think I've got figured out.

Peace.

Kara

Discretion, Circumspection and Plain Old Prudence

1The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel:

2for attaining wisdom and discipline;
for understanding words of insight;
3for acquiring a disciplined and prudent life,
doing what is right and just and fair;
4for giving prudence to the simple,
knowledge and discretion to the young—
5let the wise listen and add to their learning,
and let the discerning get guidance—
Proverbs 1:1-5


Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman who shows no discretion.
Proverbs 11:22

I, wisdom, dwell together with prudence;
I possess knowledge and discretion.
Proverbs 8:12



As I've been pondering the place of boundaries in my life, the topic of discretion now presents itself.

I realize that much of the hurt and disillusionment I am experiencing with some of the human relationships in my life have come about due to a lack of prudence on my part.
You see, I am good at keeping other people's secrets, but I am bad at keeping my own.

I'm not sure why this is. I could chalk it up to talking too much, but I think it's more than that. It's that needing approval thing again. I think.

I am eager to share my heart with others and be affirmed.

Also, I always liked the idea that with me, people know what they are getting. I don't hide stuff or play mind games with people. What you see is what you get, sort-of-thing.

But sometimes I assume someone is interested in my heart when they really aren't.

Halfway through explaining some great idea I had or something new I learned, I notice the person I am talking to, their eyes are glazing over and they have a kind of plastic smile that looks very polite.... and I am wrecked.
I realize I trusted something precious, a piece of me, to someone who really could care less (even if they are someone who seemingly should care more).


Jesus said,
"Do not give dogs what is sacred; do not throw your pearls to pigs. If you do, they may trample them under their feet, and then turn and tear you to pieces." Matthew 7:6

Specifically, Jesus is talking about sharing the gospel with combatant non-believers, but I think a similar application could be made regarding sharing something very precious with someone who is unable to have any appreciation for it.


I'm still not sure how to have healthy boundaries without becoming overly self-aware or come off as snobbish or distant. I know there is a balance somewhere in all that.

What I do know, is that some people simply are not 'safe'. And there are matters of the heart and soul that are private.

It's not melodramatic or melancholy, it just is what it is.

Proverbs 4:23 instructs:

"Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life."

Sometimes I think we can share our heart and still guard it by keeping a tight check on our expectations. And then sometimes, I think we just need to keep our mouths shut. :)

I'll be "shutting up" and tuning out this coming month, with the exception of keeping my gratitude list going on Mondays (the Gratitude Community has been a wonderful accountability tool!).

Perhaps I will find that silence is golden!




Kara

What I Learned on Vacation

Rest is good.

The end of our vacation comes tomorrow. We have been away from home for over three-and-a-half weeks. Our time leading up to vacation was like a firestorm. It wore me out more than I realized. I needed watering, feeding and nourishing. I had not noticed how bone-dry the well had become.

Shortly after arriving back to the South, I went swiftly into visitation mode. Seeking to connect with as many as I could.... many more than was possible. It was wonderful seeing the people I was able to see, but exhausting too. And a little sad. There are so many people that have sowed into my life and I into theirs, and I couldn't see them all. The ones I did get to see, I could only really get a little snippet of what their life is now in the time we had together. I am grateful for those visits, but in totality, they left me with a greater understanding of myself than I had anticipated.

It's been two years since leaving the South, and I really can't hold onto all that life was and at the same time live the life that is.

Later, as I spent time with family and friends in Florida and Tennessee, I realized something else. I had disordered my priorities with good things. In seeking to serve the Lord through serving others I had lost the pulse on those closest to me. How many hours had I spent on the phone arranging something for someone I know only casually, and when was the last time I spoke to my brother or one of my sisters? How many times have I fed someone else's kid, and when was the last time I played outside with one of my own?

There were a lot more of these kinds of questions that somehow (Holy Spirit?) invaded my mind.
I realized something else.

I care about how people think of me much more than I would like to admit. Over the past few weeks, I have felt the keen eyes of scrutiny turned in my direction, and often from someone close to me who I know to love me dearly. As they say, 'It takes one to know one'. This is how I know the weight of unspoken criticism..... because I, myself, have been the purveyor of such enough times to know it when I see it. Guess what? I am not enough for some people and for others.... I am way too much. It's truly a precious few that I can be at rest with. And so it is for most folks. I am no exception in this way.

And there is grace for this.
The audience of One.

It has been His way with me to often use others to breathe conviction into my heart and mind. He has spoken to me through His word and Holy Spirit as the only mouthpiece as well. I do not suspect He will discontinue any of His various means of discipline and guidance.

What I have learned is that He sends seasons and reminders. He makes us to turn a corner to show us something new.
He is leading me around a corner. I can feel it's sharp edge. He is pulling me away from my addiction to man's approval, back to the audience of One.

That is His grace.

In the month of August we are pulling back.... my family and me. We are unplugging and disconnecting in order to reconnect and learn to dance again for the audience of One.

This is His grace.

How I need His grace.




LYMYWY,
Kara

Looking back......

is hard not to do.

  A few days ago Sarah Grace and I went to North Carolina for a quick weekend trip.  This trip was a bit more relaxed than the one Samuel and I took about a month earlier.  The weather was wonderful.  The air was crisp and the skies were sunny for the most part.  It felt warmer than Oregon has been feeling.  

I woke up the first morning we were there to find my little girl asleep in her bed with her scrapbook opened above her head.  She had pulled out little cards and pictures from her former life and the sun was pouring through her windows upon the whole scene and yet she slept soundly for lack of anything louder than a bird chirping outside her window.  

I made my way downstairs into my bright, happy kitchen noticing how the little plant clipping Monica had given us had finally formed roots inside the little vase that had become its home months ago.   I wondered how we will ever get it to Portland.  I remembered how there had been so many beautiful flowers on that kitchen table and so many precious friends gathered around it.  There were Lincoln Logs scattered all over the family room floor as SG had pulled them out the night before to build one of her creations like she used to love to do.   I used to get frustrated sometimes at the mess those Lincoln Logs would make.   The street was quiet outside.  I knew Sarah Grace would want to ride her bike in the cul-de-sac when she woke up.  She had been talking about it. 

 When Samuel and I came a month ago, all his neighborhood friends came over and they tromped through the woods all day, sliding down the "cliff", disciphering "indian" writings on trees, and collecting precious "crystals".  They came back all muddy, full of the smell of little boys playing.  I fussed at them for tracking dirt into the house.  Samuel entertained them with his piano playing and they all wanted to come with him to Mrs. Abercrombie's house (his old piano teacher), so he could show her all he has learned in Portland.  ( These were his friends who loved him and admired him and left posters on our door for him and made special arrangements to be around that weekend so they could play with him. ) They wanted to see him play for Mrs. Abercrombie.

This past trip, when Sarah Grace and I went to church, we were greeted with the love of people who knew us.  A few knew we would be there, and others were surprised to see us but either way they all made room for us.  In the church service SG sat next to Makenzie at the other end of the pew from where I was sitting.  You can do that there, let your kid sit a few people away and know the grown ups she is sitting next to will watch out for her.  She stood up on the pew during praise and worship time and belted out her songs to God.  She loves to praise Him that way.  She clapped during a more upbeat song.  It made me smile.  She and Makenzie had a great time singing and drawing together during the service, but at the closing song, SG reached her hand out in back of her to grab the hand of her friend Anabelle, who was sitting directly behind her.  All three girls held hands and sang together.  It was sweet and it was sad.  I wished SG could grow up with those girls.  I looked around at the other children of my friends and felt a tinge of resentment that I would not be able to watch them grow up, but would just become some strange lady that randomly appears in their lives from time to time commenting about how big and grown they have become.  

That Sunday afternoon, back at the house, the doorbell rang.  It was Mark.  He is the owner of Hershey.  Hershey is the toy poodle the kids used to play with and Mark and Tracy (who have no kids) would let Samuel and Sarah Grace walk him.  Mark and Tracy would hang out and chat with me or Greg or both of us while the kids would play with Hershey.  After we moved, Hershey would pull at his leash to come to our door.  I think he liked the kids as much as they liked him.  When I opened the door, Mark handed me a framed picture of Hershey to give to the kids.  He told me to call him later and he would bring Hershey over to play with Sarah Grace.  

Kirsten was hanging out with us at the house and when I closed the door she commented about how it was no wonder this was such a hard place to leave...with so many people caring for us...even a dog. 

 

Julianna and SG were pretty much inseparable the whole weekend.  We pulled Julianna out of school early Monday and the girls rode bikes and played until it was time to go to the airport.  The tears came after I bid farewell to Elaine (Julianna's mom, and my friend).  I had to get going at that point...we had a plane to catch and all.  I kept running around the house from room to room making sure everything was just so, making a check-list for Greg for the next month when he would be there to meet the movers.  I think it was really just an excuse to be in the house longer.  In each of its rooms.  Allowing the memories to fill my senses.  I knew the exercise had become fruitless and it was time to go.

The house is sold.  I will not be going back.  A month ago, I dedicated it to the Lord as a memorial stone....like the stones the Israelites would erect as memorials to God's faithfulness.  The reason it is so hard to leave is because of how good life was there.  It is sad to leave it, but it is also cause to be thankful to the One who made it so good.  I will not forget what He did for us there.

I prayed for the new family that would live there.  I asked that He would bless their home.  I decided to leave the same scripture on the chalk board (which will be staying with the house...the buyers asked for it) that I wrote on it as we began on this strange journey so many months ago:

"Lord, You have assigned me my portion and my cup; You have made my lot secure."

Psalm 16:5

Today, the sun is shining in Portland.  Not wimpy sunshine that comes and goes, but full-on sun, unwavering and undisturbed by any cloud of any sort.  It's a perfect day to take a run through the evergreens.  The kids and I will be lacing up our shoes and heading out shortly.

The Lord is faithful.

LYMYWY,

Kara